I write for a videogame website (it’s called Destructoid; you should check it out some time). But yesterday, I received a non-videogame-related press release. It’s not a rare occurrence, and I almost always delete them with the quickness.
But I’m keeping this one. The title? Breaking // 900 Pounds Of Butterfingers as Gift To Wes Welker Delivered to Copley Square [photo here]
Yep, I’m gonna savor that for a long, long time.
If you watch the goddamn Puppy Bowl instead of the Super Bowl today, the terrorists win.
THIS IS AMERICA, BITCHES. In this, the greatest country in the history of the universe, REAL AMERICANS gather on this holiest of days to watch MEN partake in the MANLIEST SPORT OF ALL, AMERICAN FOOTBALL, and to watch CORPORATIONS (who are ALSO PEOPLE) hawk their wares at $3.5 million per 30 seconds, while consuming those most AMERICAN of foods, chicken wings and beer and pizza and heros, in a beautiful orgy of violence, consumerism, and excess that represents the VERY BEST that these UNITED STATES OF AMERICA have to offer.
Amen.
Here’s my full review of EA Sports’ NHL 12. Spoiler: it’s yet another very, very good hockey game from the folks at EA Canada.
Now that I’ve reviewed this and Madden NFL 12, I can finally dive into Deus Ex: Human Revolution!
Hey, I have a Tumblr!
I know it’s been forever since I’ve posted on here, and I suppose pimping your own work isn’t the best way to re-introduce yourself, but… deal with it. (Or unfollow me — hell, I’m assuming most of you will after this post, if you haven’t already.)
Because of my day job, I haven’t written much for Destructoid at all lately. But I’m still the main sports guy there, and I handle almost all the big sports reviews. Here’s the biggest one of all, Madden NFL 12.
I’ll be back in a week or so with another link — I’m also reviewing NHL 12.
A week ago, 2K Sports invited a bunch of journalists (including yours truly) to a press event at Citi Field before a Phillies-Mets game. We met the winner of the Major League Baseball 2K11 $1 million perfect-game contest, a guy named Brian Kingrey from Hammond, Louisiana, and I wrote a story on Destructoid about him.
They had the journalists play Kingrey and try to get hits off of him, just like last year. I was the only one who got a hit against the 2010 million-dollar winner, and I won a Jose Reye-autographed Mets jersey (which I promptly gave to my brother, a Mets fan, as a graduation present). I also won this year, and I got the item in the photo above: a baseball autographed by Roy Halladay! I think I’ll hold on to this one…
For the full story, go here.
Marketing Campaign of the Day: New Era launched a new ad campaign today, which features John Krasinski as a die-hard Red Sox fan engaging in some exponentially trashier trash talk with loyal Yankees supporter Alec Baldwin.
Meanwhile, the Red Sox snapped a six-game losing streak by defeating the Yankees 9-6 on Opening Day at Fenway. Do with that what you will.
“Go ahead, celebrate in April. We’ll dance in October.”
kayfabe: In 1972, four years after playing his last game for the team, the…
In 1972, four years after playing his last game for the team, the legendary Mickey Mantle was sent a letter by then-Vice-President of the New York Yankees, Bob Fishel, and asked to contribute to the Yankee Stadium’s forthcoming 50th anniversary celebrations. All Mickey had to do was fill in the enclosed survey and share details of his “outstanding experience at Yankee Stadium.”
Below is the letter, and Mantle’s surprising response.
I consider the following my outstanding experience at Yankee Stadium:
— I got a blow-job under the right field Bleachers, by the Yankee Bull pen.
This event occurred on or about: (Give as much detail as you can)
— It was about the third or fourth inning. I had a pulled groin and couldn’t fuck at the time. She was a very nice girl and asked me what to do with the cum after I came in her mouth. I said don’t ask me, I’m no cock-sucker.
Signed: Mickey Mantle, The All-American BoyHERO.
What a man.
(Source: lettersofnote.com)
IN CASE YOU MISSED IT: John Wall’s bounce pass alley-oop to Blake Griffin. No big deal.
(via @jose3030)
Wow.
This video has everything you could possibly want.
- Two beautiful John Wall passes
- One crazy dunk by Blake Griffin
- Zero fucks given by Demarcus Cousins
I watched the first 6 seconds of this video probably 30 times. That was pretty ridiculous.
Uh-mazing.
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I’m Samit Sarkar, an Associate Editor at Destructoid.com. It’s pretty much the greatest job in the world, though the common misconception is that I simply get to play video games all day. It doesn’t quite work that way — but it’s still awesome. (If you want to check out all the posts I’ve written, head here.)
I’m a stickler for proper English — grammar, punctuation, spelling, etc. — so if you see any mistakes in my writing, let me know. And if you see mistakes elsewhere, let me know, because I’ll want to point them out here and laugh (à la English Fail Blog). I might even put some on The Grammar Nazi, a Tumblr that I contribute to.
You can contact me at samit [dot] sarkar [at] gmail [dot] com for personal stuff, at samit [at] destructoid [dot] com for Destructoid-related inquiries, or on Twitter (see below). I’m also on Facebook.
Oh, in case you’re wondering, I’m 25 and I live in Long Island. But it’s so much easier to just say New York — I’m only an hour east of Manhattan.
Also, I am a HUGE fan of the 27-time World Champion New York Yankees.
